I rub my eyes and wonder what this day will bring. I walk over to the water, splash it in my face, see my reflection. My heart sinks. How could I be here?? What has become of me?? I have become the very thing I hate. My family has deserted me, my friends use me, and God, well, I'm not even sure there is such a thing. Is there any hope for someone like me?
I was born to a poor family. I know what it's like to go to bed hungry. I was given in 'marriage' when I was just 13. The man knew no love so I was the recipient of many beatings. He died and I was left with nothing. So, I sold my body. I knew of nothing else to do. My family refused to help me and my friends had excuses. Love was a foreign word to me. I had never experienced love from anyone. My heart was as cold as a stone. I learned at a early age to 'kill' whatever life it had so I could survive. I really didn't feel anything anymore except rage. There were times this rage would take over my body and I would become this screaming lunatic. It was like I had no control over my actions. My physical strength would become so intense that grown men couldn't contain me. This was my life. My body felt like a tomb with only death in it. My reputation had grown so that I was even receiving men that were 'religious'. My hatred for God and religion grew rapidly. This morning I woke up to find a nervous-looking man at my back door. Quietly he said, "Can I come in?" I responded, "You can if you have payment." reaching into his bag he pulled out a couple of coins. I said, "Come this way" We walked over to the pallet on the floor. He sat down. His eyes darted back and forth and his palms were sweaty. Something didn't feel right but the man had paid so I had to do my job. As I sat beside him the door flung opened and the sun was so bright I couldn't see. I felt many hands all over my body, jolting, pulling, dragging me outside. I guess my miserable life is over now, I thought. I hope it is over quick and I hope death will bring me some peace. Finally, they stop dragging me and throw me on the ground. My whole body is aching. I taste the grit in my mouth and the burning in my eyes from the sand. I hear a older man ask another what should be done with me? Should we stone her? Who would dare speak against the law of Moses. It is the law that has governed us for years. Why would anyone rescue me? I am nothing but a prostitute that brings shame. I try to look up and see a man bent over drawing in the sand. All of a sudden a searing pain shoots through my neck and I lay my head back down on the hard ground. I am tired. I am done with this life. I just wish they would get on with it. My ears hear the hard 'thug' of rocks. I jump. Then realize they are not hitting me but falling to the ground. Shadows start disappearing and I feel the warmth of the sunlight on my back. I feel a man's calloused hands brushing the hair out of my face. I look and see him. Never have I seen a man with love in his eyes. Penetrating, piercing love that was reaching my heart of stone. He says," Woman, where are they? Has no one condemned you?" I look around and no accuser is there. "No one, sir" Then he spoke words that healed my heart," Then neither do I condemn you, Go and leave your life of sin." I can't actually put into words what happened next but I felt my heart of stone become a heart of flesh, beating, pulsating. I felt alive. The weight of my sin, my shame, my guilt was gone. I felt like huge weight was lifted off my shoulders. The world held possibilities again. I didn't have to live in my life of sin anymore. This man they call, JESUS had my attention. I listened to his teachings and realized that there is a GOD and that HE truly loves me. I left my old life and started following Jesus. I wanted to hear all He said. He was the only one who had the words of life. He healed a heart that wasn't just broken but had been dead along time. He gave me NEW LIFE!
Based on John 8: 1-11
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small world. BIG GOD. I read John 8:1-11 as my morning devotion this morning. God must have a message for me today. Thanks for being obedient to write an incredible story to bring Glory to God. You're good.
ReplyDeleteLOVE YOU.